Kwaku Opoku-Dame
Do you have a boyfriend or girlfriend or are you already in a committed relationship or thinking about settling down with your current partner? If so, some of this advice might come a little late—but it’s never too late to learn and grow. And if you’re just starting out in a relationship, even better.
Many people make innocent mistakes early in their love lives, not realizing how deeply those choices can affect their future. While honesty is a powerful foundation in any relationship, there are certain truths better left unsaid—at least for now. Oversharing too soon can create cracks that weaken your bond before it’s had the chance to truly grow.
So, if you’re dating and not yet married, here are 7 things you should never disclose to your boyfriend or girlfriend.
- Your Exact Salary or Net Worth
Talking about money is important—but not when you’re still building trust. Revealing your exact income or how much you’re worth to your boyfriend or girlfriend can turn the relationship into a financial transaction. You risk being seen as a provider rather than a partner, and that can attract the wrong motives. Support your partner if you can, but save the detailed financial talks for when there’s shared responsibility—like in marriage.
- Past or Present Feelings for Someone Else
You may feel tempted to open up about your past crushes or old flames, but be careful. Even if those feelings are long gone, your partner might not see it that way. Mentioning a current co-worker you once liked, or a friend you still feel drawn to, can create lingering insecurities. Keep emotional boundaries strong by leaving old feelings where they belong—in the past.
- Your Doubts About Love or Commitment
Not everyone enters a relationship with full confidence in love. But voicing your doubts too often can cause your partner to question the future. If you regularly express uncertainty about relationships, marriage, or commitment, it can create emotional distance. Even if your partner doesn’t say it aloud, they might start planning their exit in silence.
- Your Cheating History
If you’ve cheated in the past and have changed since, that’s commendable. But confessing your cheating history early in a relationship can plant seeds of distrust. Your partner may begin to overanalyze your actions or suspect you’ll repeat the same behavior. Unless it’s crucial to the context of your relationship, some past mistakes are best left as lessons you’ve learned privately.
- How Much You Loved Being Single
Talking about how fun and free your single life was can make your partner feel unappreciated—or even unwanted. It may seem harmless, but comments like “I miss those days when I didn’t have to check in with anyone” or “I used to go anywhere I wanted” can send the wrong message. It could seem like you’re not fully committed or still longing for a life without them.
- Comparisons to Your Ex
One of the biggest relationship killers is comparing your current partner to your ex. Whether you’re saying your ex was better or worse, it doesn’t matter—comparison is harmful. It can lead to self-doubt, resentment, and unnecessary competition. Your partner deserves to feel like they are valued for who they are, not measured against someone from your past.
- Constant Complaints About Your Body Insecurities
Everyone has insecurities, but constantly bringing up how much you dislike your legs, your weight, or another part of your body can put emotional pressure on your partner. It can make them feel responsible for validating you all the time. While occasional vulnerability is healthy, it’s important to work on your confidence from within. Your partner can support you—but they can’t fix how you see yourself.
Final Thoughts
No relationship is perfect—but learning what to share, when to share it, and how much to reveal can help protect the emotional foundation you’re building. These seven things might seem small, but avoiding them could make the difference between a temporary romance and a lasting love.
Guard your relationship with wisdom, not just emotions. Sometimes, it’s not about hiding things—but about allowing love to grow in peace and trust.
What Do You Think?
Have you made any of these mistakes before? Do you agree or disagree with any of these points? Share your thoughts in the comments below. And if you found this helpful, don’t forget to share with a friend who needs to read this.